Footprint Friends and an Unexpected Wordy Shout Out

After thinking about my Other Half, I've pondered several of my female relationships. Through various stages, I've met some incredible women. We are naturally social. It's not always intentional or with purpose, but we are. We crave closeness and connections men can't possibly understand and have a harder time filling. Have you ever left a job and only remorseful that you won't see certain people? Have you ever wondered what life would be like without certain friends? Have you ever reflected on your friendships?

The answers are quite simple for me. The women of my family created perfect examples of poise, grace, friendship, sisterhood, love, and the value of a bond. My short little grandma passed secrets to my mom on stirring pots of homemade goodness that not only filled our stomachs but our hearts as well. And many years later, the women in my family created our ever-growing group known as DOMML, Daughters of Mary Murphy Longest, my grandma. We meet, dine and catch up about every 6 weeks. Without it, I wouldn't see some of these women even once a year. But now it's something I eagerly anticipate. It makes me appreciate the dynamic women in my family.... and girrrrl, can they cook! I have a specially unique sister that reminds me more of our Mom everyday. She and I butt heads one moment and share a hug the next. Never underestimate the power of sisters. Though different, our paths aren't too far divided. And I have this incredibly diva cousin that lets me step out of my own head when I've had enough. We share a beer.... and a tear as needed.... pick each other up and keep going. She sends silly messages when I need it most and is the "go-to" woman on a broad range of topics. Both being single, we encourage and understand in ways others may not. It can be a cruel world out there, it's nice to have the right women not only on your side, but in your family!

We all having "passing friendships"- those that last only as long as the need. You may genuinely care for them, meeting at work or school or the like. Once that chapter closes, the friendships tend to dwindle away. Then there are the "subject friendships" where you have something of shared importance with minimal interaction otherwise. It may be as simple as a shared love for a particular band or parents of your children's friends. You like them enough to be spend time with them as long as the shared interest in involved. Then you have the "footprint friendships." These have left a lasting impact. Even if you were to never speak again, they are etched in your heart.

I have a handful of footprint friends and luckily most are still visible on the outside. I had grown away from one in particular through changing times, but she did a remarkable thing that will forever touch my heart. I was standing in the funeral home wishing away the hours during my Mom's visitation. There was a constant blurring stream of people paying their respects, nearly 1000 we later learned. I was drained from the preceding weeks, emotionally spent and in a fog. And there, standing alone in the back, was my footprint friend. I hadn't seen her in YEARS. She fumbled with her keys, apologizing, her eyes completely breaking for me. I was so surprised to see her. I was so happy to see her. I was so thankful to see her. She dusted off our footprints with that one resonating gesture and now we are back at it on a daily basis. We have a history, a mutual understanding, a love of dancing and music and letting loose, a bond that is now just a given in our busy lives. We choose not to judge, but to support, uplift, listen and I keep her close to my heart.

Two other important women very well could have been "passing friendships" but quickly became footprint friends. Our careers brought us together, but shared times and thoughts forged friendships. One is on the quiet side, slightly reserved and incredibly insightful. I may be searching for words, stumbling over statements, unsuccessfully trying to explain what I'm thinking and she quietly listens for a moment..... pauses..... and can explain what I feel in a minute or less. We share the same witty, but sometimes less than ladylike humor... which makes it even better. We respect each other's journey and encourages the other to blaze the trail to the left. She just gets it. I don't know how else to explain her wonderful self. She encourages me to seek happiness, to grab the moment, to never settle. She has nerves of steel and will speak up when others are quiet. She keeps things in perspective. I admire, respect, and learn from her.

Then the other footprint friend makes me laugh when I don't want to, smile when I think I can't, and reminds me I'm not 80 years old. She is going a hundred miles an hour at any given moment, but will skreeech to a halt if she thinks something's wrong. She is bighearted, loves to laugh, brings whimsy to my day with her hot mess, jacked up, boom boom pow friendship. I can say absolutely, 100% any random thing to her and she can run with it and validate my thoughts. She may be telling me I have a wonderfully unique heart that deserves more then stop mid sentence to say I'm looking mighty bootylicious. She just makes me laugh. It seems one of us is always saying what the other is thinking.

Blessed! Lucky! Thankful! For the wonderful footprint friends I mentioned and those I didn't as well. The women that "get it" and have room in their hearts and lives for another woman. I just hope they all know I appreciate and love them. And they are each uniquely fabulous!!!