Check Please!

Wow! The dating world has changed so much since I was last in it- some 13 years ago. Now, it's all about online dating, text messaging, "hooking up" and skipping some of the great moments along the way.

My first venture out was about 2 years ago and it started by finding an old friend, one whom I was wild about at one time and hadn't seen in 17 years. The first date was GREAT and lasted into the wee hours sitting on a river bank talking about EVERYTHING. I thought "Is this man for real?!? This is what I have been missing!" Fast forward and no, the man isn't for real... the man is a player. Men like him know what to say, when to say it, and how to make a woman feel like the center of the universe when they need it the most. The problem with a player is if YOU never walk away, it will go on and on. Just when you are done, they come around with their well-rehearsed lines and try to draw you back in. Well, not me. I walked away..... then came back a few months later, that pesky tall, dark handsome man. Actually I think just being friends with Player is good for me- I have a good learning curve on how to date like a man. And that's just what I planned to do.....

Several months later, I "met" (online, of course) a man that seemed interesting enough, busy enough to not expect me to drop everything to be with him, and we had good conversations. He was polite and understanding when I turned down his first two invitations to dinner. One day, I thought, WHAT am I waiting for?!? So I eagerly said yes the next time and went to buy a new outfit. As I was getting ready, I thought "Tonight, Mommy isn't going to be Mommy, but a fun, single woman." He chose a very nice restaurant, I was a little nervous. I do much better with just meeting for drinks, but this was an excellent place for a date. Sooo, I met Mr. Nice Enough and he looked NOTHING like the pictures he had posted.... My friends and I are actually still debating if that was his friend's pic or if it was just about 10 years old and 60 lbs lighter. I try not to judge, but HATE it when someone misrepresents. Then add this conversation 5 minutes into our date and I was DONE!

Nice enough man: Sooo, we've talked about everything on the phone. There are a few things we didn't cover. There's one thing I am dying to know...

Naive girl (me): Oh yeah? (smiling) What's that?

Nice enough: Well, how do you shave?

Naive and confused: What?

Nice enough: You know, how do you shave down there?

Naive and disgusted: Uh, with a razor.

Nasty Enough: Well, maybe later I'll just have to find out for myself.

Naive no more: Only if you call my ex-boyfriend and ask him. Check, please!

So, maybe I can't date just like EVERY man. Some of them are jerks. =)

From Where I'm Standing

The one fact is that life is constantly changing. I thought I had my world planned out. Like dancing through a field of daisies, I was oblivious to the looming thunderstorm ahead. Within a very short time, my dear Mom passed away, my marriage was ending, and I had an 18 month old and 3 year old relying on me to not fall apart. So I picked up the pieces (aka "putting my big girl pants on") and kept on going.

So here I sit, three years later in a different house, with a different life, even different furniture. I should admit I shoved all of the old out the front door and had an impromptu yard sale in a moment of indifference. But what relief, moving to a new house and leaving broken memories behind! Only one thing in my life has remained constant and that is to give my children stability, continuous love and affirmation that we were going to be FINE.... even better than fine. We were going to be wonderful and have a great life. So many changes and I often worried I just wasn't doing enough, that they would feel short changed from my decisions, that my best just wasn't enough for the three of us.

I was updating my daughter's baby book last night when I started thinking about transitions and separations over the past few years. I was SO worried about her riding the bus today. I was positive my heart would leap out of my chest before the moment arrived. While looking at pictures from the moment SHE arrived, I realized she's already been through some incredibly challenging times. She has always known I was here when she needed me- she could see me, grab my hand and look to me for reassurance. Sure, we stumbled here and there, but we always kept going. Getting on the bus today was the center point of her KNOWING I am still here, always. She climbed to the top of the steps, looked back at me with her half smile, I nodded reassuringly, she gave me a full smile back and off she went. As I watched the bus carrying my precious doll, tears filled my eyes. I halfway expected her to grab my leg, to beg me to let her stay home, to hold on tight. But she did none of those. Life has thrown my little 5 year old some curve balls, and today gave ME the reassurance that she can adapt to anything and she knows I will not fail her and I am always holding her hand....

My Life!

Hi and welcome to my blog. I'm excited to start this new outlet and see just where it goes! I plan on covering everything from the daily insanity of being a single mom to being back on the dating scene. Yikes, bite nails (STOP that, you have to PAINT them again!). It has all been a process to say the least. One that I am still learning and adjusting to. To sum it up, I started off growing up in the Waltons Family, have found myself spending the past few years on The Springer Show, and now I must just stay off the the Maury "Who's Your Daddy" episodes. Kidding! But it wouldn't hurt my feelings if someone nominated me for The Bachelorette!